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> Long ago and far away, > In a land that time forgot, > Before the days of Dylan, > Or the dawn of Camelot. > > There lived a race of innocents, > And they were you and me, > Long ago and far away > In the Land That Made Me Me. > > For Ike...

1.. You walka pasta da bakery. 2.. You walka pasta da candy store. 3.. You walka pasta da Ice Cream shop. 4.. You walka pasta da table and fridge. You willa losea da weight! AND..... CONCERNED ABOUT TOO MANY CARBS IN YOUR DIET? For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final...

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Occasionally I click on the logos here on EO for the different expedite companies to read what they offer, and what they are looking for. I never see any truck specs listed, as to what age vehicle they accept. Anyone else notice that? Rule of thumb was always 5 yrs. for a straight, and 10 for a...

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WOMAN'S POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed...

Inside.

WOMAN'S POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed...

Inside.

I met a “mature†woman at a bar last night. I’ve gotta tell ya, pal, she wasn't bad for 57. Well anyway, we drank and chatted a bit … then she asked if I'd ever had the "sportsman's double" - a mother and daughter threesome? I confessed that no, I’ve never had the pleasure. Then we...

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise . Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the...

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise . Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the...

Real Women Vs. Martha Stewart Martha's way #1 Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. The Real Women's Way: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake,you are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up, eating it...

You're too stupid to lead... AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked "intellectual leadership". He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence... S.W.A.T. mosquitos... Police in Oakland, California...

First, you should decide what type of trucking you´d like to do. Do you want to go big rig (18 wheeler) or straight truck,or van? Along with that decision you should look at your goals, as to what you want from trucking, like being home most weekends, most nights, or travel the country as an...

somethng I´ve never found the answer to, though I´ve tried many many times. How do you get rid of >> from something you foward, without deleting them one at a time?

Billy Bob's pregnant sister was in a terrible car accident and went intoa deep coma. After being in the coma for nearly six months, she wakes upand sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor replies, "Ma'am, you had twins! A boy and a girl...

This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries by the Michigan Department of Environmental Quality, State of Michigan. This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before you get to the response letter. Dear Mr. DeVries: It has come to the attention of the...

This is a story about a popular young Rabbi, who on Sabbath Eve announced to his congregation that he will not renew his contract. He explained that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more. There is a hush. No one wants him to leave. Sol Epstein, who owns several car...

Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of: "You know you're a redneck when...... ???????? 1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree. 2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter. 3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. 4. You...