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THE JOB - URINE TEST (I wonder who wrote this one!) Like a lot of folks in my state, I have a job. I work, they pay me. I pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as it sees fit. In order to get that paycheck, I am required to pass a random urine test with which I have no...

My fellow Identity-Americans: As your future President I want to thank my supporters, for their ... well, support. Your mindless support of me, despite my complete lack of any legislative achievement, my pastor's relations with Louis Farrakhan and Libyan dictator Moamar Quadafi, or my...

An old prospector walks his tired old mule into a western town one day. He'd been out in the desert for about six months without a drop of whiskey. He walked up to the first saloon he came to and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there brushing some of the dust from...

Take this test and see how savvy you really are. Can you correctly recognize the icons. I got 18 out of 20. Beat that. cramersweeney.com No cheating.

Feng Shui and you Take just a couple of minutes to take this test &see what happens! If you are honest this tells the truth -- it's pretty good. Write your answers on a piece of paper, NO cheating!! The answers are at the bottom... 1. Which is your favourite color: red, black...

RECENT STUDY FOUND OUT WHICH DAYS MEN PREFER TO HAVE SEX. IT WAS FOUND THAT MEN PREFERRED TO ENGAGE IN SEXUAL ACTIVITY ON THE DAYS THAT STARTED WITH THE LETTER "T". EXAMPLES TUESDAY THURSDAY TODAY TOMORROW THANKSGIVING THATURDAY THUNDAY ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~...

Check out this site if you want to see all the superbowl ads. It`s hard to beat the Budlight minds. Budweiser's dog and pony show takes top Ad Meter spot - USATODAY.com

A Japanese company ( Toyota ) and an American company (General Motors) decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile. The Americans, very discouraged and...

Every 14th of February you get the chance to display your fondness for your wife or girlfriend by showering her with gifts, flowers, dinner, shows and any other baubles that women find romantic. Secretly...guys feel left out. That's right...left out. There's no...

If "w" was to resign today...this sould be his last speech... Normally, I start these things out by saying 'My Fellow Americans.' Not doing it this time. If the polls are any indication, I don't know who more than half of you are anymore. I do know something terrible has happened, and...

Three Rednecks were working up on a cell phone tower: Cooter, Ronnie and Donnie. As they start their descent Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Ronnie says, 'Well, damn, someoneshould go and tell his wife.'...

This is Ray Stevens at his best... YouTube - squirrel music video

My dad used to say "the only substitute for experience is to be 18".

This was done by a 15 year old girl. http://www.youtube.com/v/ervaMPt4Ha0&autoplay=1

oneliners

A blonde was weed-eating her yard and accidentally cut off the tail of her cat which was hiding in the grass. She rushed her cat, along with the tail over to WALMART! Why WALMART??? HELLOOOOOOOOO! WALMART is the largest retailer in the world!!!

How could you ever verify a persons contribution to the growth and betterment of the expediting industry? Is this going to be an actual hall in an actual building, or just a computer list voted on by the few claiming to represent the many? Or, are we talking an EO hall of fame for the growth and...

I think what Terry did here was give a good barometer of the approximate costs of owning and operating the same van for 5 years. There is no way to come up with an exact figure. What happens if you need major repairs that you have to pay for? If the price of fuel fluctuates?, and on and on. As...

A blonde and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has been in the backyard barking for hours and hours. The blonde jumps up out of bed and says 'I've had enough of this'. She goes downstairs. The blonde finally comes back up to bed and her husband...

See how quick you really are. http://www.bbc.co.uk./science/humanbody/sleep/sheep/reaction_version5.swf