Driver Lifestyles

Team Drivers For Life

 In expedited trucking, the most successful teams are typically husband/wife or committed couples.

And, why not? 

The money they earn goes into the same pot and unlike the two-person teams (two unrelated drivers) found most often in general trucking, the expediter couple has a relationship history.  They've probably been through a number of life's ups and downs together, so they've found ways to adapt to the other person's moods and personality quirks.

But, even in a committed relationship, life ain't no bed of roses. 

Too little freight and the accompanying stress of sitting in a truck stop for days can become as harmful as running too hard without a break.  Sharing the tight spaces of a sitting truck may be even more difficult than sharing a truck that is constantly moving.

The flip side of that scenario is of course, when freight is moving and the team is running as long as their hours permit.  The stress of being on-time, every time coupled with long hours behind the wheel can magnify every little irritant and result in a yelling match or stony silence.

The married, single-income team share the common financial goals  - paying off the truck, paying the bills back home and earning a living that is equally shared.
 
Although the stress-inducing task of making money to pay those bills can put a real strain on the relationship as well, it can also help a couple form a stronger bond through their shared commitment to the future.
 
There are many husband/wife teams who are able to remain best friends despite the long, at times, stressful hours in the close quarters of a truck cabin.

Judy and Skip Beebe have been sharing the confines of a straight truck for over seven years with Skip as the driver and Judy as his ride-along partner. 

Judy says, "We enjoy our time together and I enjoy riding with him.  I pick the routes and do all the paperwork which frees him to drive. We have a policy in the truck that Skip will not talk on the phone while he's driving, so I handle any communications including the Qualcomm. I feel I'm a big part of Skip's business."  
 
David and Patty Jo Jaynes are straight truck owner-operators and David says that life for the couple while in the truck is "no different than at home - we fight like cats and dogs," he says with a laugh.
 
Patty Jo says that when things become tense between them, it's time to take a break.
 
"If we have time, we'll stop at a Cracker Barrel or Bob Evans to get a bite to eat.  I find that if we're out among other people and outside of the truck environment, you forget whatever was causing that stress in the truck seems to disappear."
 
"Or, I'm irritated about something, I'll tell David that I'm a little tired and I'll go back in the sleeper, play a handheld Solitaire game or read.  We just need space."
 
"One way we keep contact in the truck is, we'll get a newspaper or two and do the crossword puzzles together while driving."
 
The Jaynes have been married for seven and a half years with five of those years spent on the road in expedited trucking.  Patty Jo says that in a stressful situation, the commitment of marriage keeps the partners from saying, "the heck with you, I'm outta here!"
 
"You have to be friends. You have to really like your partner and be able to keep everything in perspective."
 
Loyel and Carolyn Hershberger are tractor-trailer expediters who have been driving together since 1999, both in general and expedited trucking.  They were married in 2002.
 
Carolyn Hershberger says their technique for remaining friends is a simple one; "We've never had a fight while in the truck since we've been together.  If things become strained between us, we'll pull over and take a break. One of us will go into the truck stop for awhile.  Otherwise, we do everything together."
 
"At least once a week," says Loyel, "we'll get out of the truck and go see a movie, maybe go to a regular family restaurant, if we can park there.  Spending quality time together away from the truck is key." 
 
"If we're out on the road over a weekend without a load, or maybe just once a month, we'll get a motel and get away from the truck.  If you're on a long run and you don't have time to stop except for food or fuel; that can create stress in the truck. It's all about working as a team and if you're not friends, it's not going to work."

Terry says that during 31 years of marriage and 17 years of expedited trucking in a cargo van with wife Rene', "We've had our moments!"
 
One of the secrets of getting along is that you have to bring a healthy marriage into this business.  This is not the kind of lifestyle for the couple who need marriage counseling.
 
"Another key is being able to separate the business aspects of being together from the personal relationship.  All couples have those times when we bicker and squabble over things in our personal lives, but when the Qualcomm beeps or the phone rings, you have to get into the business mode and set the personal differences aside."

Rene' echoes her husband's thoughts about the personal/business relationship:  "You might have just had an argument over something but as soon as the Qualcomm goes off, you should look at the run offer, discuss whether you should take it and forget what happened ten minutes ago."

She continues, "We get along so well that only once in 15 years did that man (Terry) want to put me on a Greyhound bus for home.  While that was happening, we got a flat tire on the van, so the argument was soon forgotten."

"The men need to understand that the wives want to be home more than they do.  We miss our things and that's why we get cranky when we've been out too long."

"You can't leave the house when you're angry," states Rene. "I would be slamming doors because I wasn't ready to leave.  But, once we were on the road, it was OK."

"It all comes down to being best friends."