DougTravels is Bored Storytelling Episode II

[cruzer]

Cruzer looks at highway and says, you sure had them figured out,they were working with the mexican drivers from the start but they sure under estimated you.Not for a minute did they suspect a thing while you were having your airstream remodeled but actualy having it converted into a submarine and to have the fuel pump attendants stowed away to act as our crew and to send your gourmet chef to take poisoned Dom Perion on to the cruise ship and having him ad exlax to all of there food there is no way mypie could ever replace you in any roll unless the star just remained in a braindead coma from start to finish of the movie. Now lets see how these mechanical arms work getting these rocks off of the sub.......several hours pass and the airstream sub is under way with just a few minor scratches...meanwhile mypie and inki continue to consume the food with exlax and drink the poison Don Parion until they both collapse in the floor in a big brown puddle and the cruise ship staff wearing masks over there faces to help protect them from the odor use fire hoses to rinse them and the stinky brown puddle over the side were the oder attracts a school of sharks and mypie and inki are quickly consumed and the sharks swim off were marine biologist witness for the first time sharks licking there butts to get a fowl taste from there mouths.......

 

[mypie]

a panhandler said, "Hey bud, you gotta buck for a homeless man?"

Then, back at this ship, sipping on Dom Perion Inkansana asks, "So, how did you know that Cruzer was the spy for the Mexican truck drivers?"

"Ah," Mypie sighs, "remember that VooDoo High Priestest?"

"Yeah."

"Well, she told me 'there is one among you that will betray you'. and then she handed me this sack. It has magic potions in it. I can't dare see the contents of this sack, but they will make themselves known to me when they are needed. Just before Cruzer started his trouble, the sack began bouncing around the table. When I opened the top, out bounced this stone. I no sooner put it in my pocket when I was pulled threw Cruzer's evil vortex. It was the stone that saved us. Too bad that we weren't able to save Highway Star." They raised their glasses and said, "here's to you Highway Star."

Just then, Inkansana witnessed the sack jumping around the table on it own. "Oh, my, what does that mean?"

"I don't quite know, we'll just open it and find out." Mypie loosened the top and out jumped a corked bottle of powder with a scroll tied up around it. Mypie untied it and it was a magic spell. It said, "Sprinkle the powder on the floor and say these words, 'lokjogow wov baz tu'" it took a few times of sounding it all out but eventually Mypie got it right. After only a few minutes, Highway Star appeared before them.

"Highway! Is it really you? You're alive!" They both ran over and hugged Highway Star.

Back at the truck stop, Doug said, "yah, here buddy," and handed him a buck. Then the man said, "Man I'm just kidding I'm the Producer. Your film has been syndicated as a soap opera and backed by some really big advertisers. We will be shooting this story on a regular basis as "As The DougTravels". Whata ya think?"

"Can I still sniff glue?"

"Yeah, the more the better."

"Then, OK, let's do it."

 

[mypie]

See, even after he is DEAD Cruzer is still trying to cause trouble. Fortunately, with the new As The DougTravels soap opera being syndicated and scooped up by some really big advertisers - Cruzer, the evil spy may live again. Because as we all know, nobody really dies in Soap Operas they just come back with new names!

You see, my hubby is Sicilian - which makes me Sicilian by injection. Hubby has informed me that he is positive dead men don't talk. He would know.

 

[DougTravels]

Good Night Mr. Walters

 

[cruzer]

I know fish turds can't type and mypie is now a fish turd at the bottom on the bottom of the sea.As we ride around in stars new airstream sub star has realy brought me up to speed on what has unfolded and as he struggled through tears of laughter he told me how he had someone switch the sack with his pooper scooper bag and the shaking was just a dung beetle he said if she feels it's magical he would have to agree because with all the pressures and problems on the set he had not had a movement in several days so that day he filled that sack was quite magical to him also...LOL...ROFL....how ironic to treasure a sack of turds and then become a fish turd....highway and cruzer raise there glasses and cruise the ocean awhile before returning to the set where they find doug holding a clear plastic bag with two little shark turds floating in sea water and holding the sack witch the dung beetle had finaly been able to free itself from taking the magical ball of turds with him........

 

[DougTravels]

Then streaking down to the set and Landing is a really cool steaming DeLorean. It lands and skids to a stop. Out of the gull winged sports car pops Doc Brown and Marty McFly. Marty says whats going on Doc?, We've got 2 different realities here! Marty:

Then you know what happened to him? You know what happened, March 15th 1973?
Doc:

Yes Marty, I know.
Cut to Doc's garage. It's a mess. Doc opens a book - Hill Valley Telegraph Archives March 1st - April 30th 1973. On the page he turns to is a headline - "George McFly Murdered: Local Author Shot Dead." We stay focused on the paper as Doc speaks.

Doc:

(v.o) I went to the public library to try and make sense out of all the madness. The place was boarded up, shut down, so I broke in and borrowed some newspapers.
The camera turns to Marty and Doc.

Marty:

I don't get it Doc, I mean how can this be happening? It's like we're in hell or something.
Doc:

No, its Hill Valley, although I can't imagine hell being much worse!
Einstein whines. Doc takes a candle and goes over to him.

Doc:

Oh Einie, I'm sorry boy, the lab is an awful, awful, awful, awful mess!
Doc gets Einstein's basket and he gets inside.

Doc:

Atta boy. (to Marty) Obviously the time continuum has been disrupted creating this new temporally venced sequence resulting in this alternative reality.
Marty:

English, Doc!
Doc:

Here, here, here, let me illustrate.
Doc finds blackboard and stands it up. He picks up some chalk.

Doc:

Imagine that this line represents time.....
Doc draws a line on the blackboard.

Doc:

...Here's the present, 1985 (He writes "1985" on the board), the future (he writes "F"), and the past (he writes "Past"). Prior to this point in time... (He points to 1985) ...somewhere in the past, the timeline skewed into this tangent, creating an alternate 1985.
Doc draws the tangent on the board and writes "1985-A" on it.

Doc:

Alternate to you, me and Einstein. But reality for everyone else.
Doc goes to the DeLorean and gets a bag out.

Doc:

Recognise this? It's the bag the sports book came in. I know, because the receipt is still inside. I found them in the time machine, along with this!
Doc shows Marty what he found. It's the top of 2015 Biff's cane!

Marty:

It's the top of Biff's cane, I mean old Biff from the future!
Doc:

Correct! It was in the time machine because Biff was in the time machine - with the sports almanac!

 

[DougTravels]

Doug scratches his head, wondering if his lame, cut and paste attempt to explain the alternate endings was in vain. Then while sitting with his new friends on the beach-

- Hey, Coleman.
- Yes.



What about lunch?
The lobster or the cracked crab?



- What do you think?
- Can't we have both?



Why not?



- Dimitri.
- Sir.



- Lobster and cracked crab for everyone.
- Extra prima good, Mr Coleman, sir.



Looking good, Billy Ray.



Feeling good, Louis.

 

[cruzer]

Cruzer stops by the beach to surprise doug(advancements in DNA were able to extract enough DNA to bring mypie and inki back from the shark poop)and also we were able to dig up the very last bottle of rum from our previous episode.He was so happy he kicked of his boots and asked mypie for a foot masage like the good ol days and mypie and inki........

 

[highway star]

...look at each other and laugh. "He puts me in a donkey show, and now he wants a foot massage? This guy really needs to get in touch with reality. Hey, is Doug alright? He's really out there, with all this Back To The Future stuff. All that glue must be taking it's toll." Inky says that she's already talked to the studio about getting him some help. They feel really good about the new series and want to protect their meal ticket.

Meanwhile, Highway Star is still pouting about being killed off. Even though he was brought back, he feels threatened. His agent calls to tell him that his reality show wasn't picked up by the network. "Look Star, they're just concerned that Octo-Mom's gonna decide to produce another litter and they'd have to stop production. For now, maybe you should get on board with the "Doug" series." "Yeah, but that Cruzer dude just refuses to die. How can they keep a story line going if he won't cooperate? Look, for now, just call the escort agency and get me some company. I need to get my head straight."

The studio psychiatrist arrives on the set and takes Doug into his trailer to talk...