Mike are you starting to think about other men being naked. Butt fixations might make you wonder about how other men deal with this problem. If you are in Minneapolis drop Cyn off at the Mall of America then head on out to the airport and try out the mens room. You may find a solution to your symptons in there.
Body dandruff...
- Thread starter mrgoodtude
- Start date
Your best bet is a liberal spray of WD-40. It's good for dry skin and crotch rot and you'll smell like a real trucker.
mrgoodtude
Not a Member
And the hits just keep coming.... 
The oils in your skin is what traps the moisture in and keeps the skin cells alive and healthy. Healthy, intact skin is your body's primary defense against infection. Having dry butt skin is akin to pitching a tent next to a dumpster.
Prolonged showers, particularly with very hot water, and harsh soaps, will strip the oils in your skin, and will dry it out. If you get out of the shower and your skin feels all clean and tight, it's dried out. Antimicrobial soaps, all of which have no proven medical or sanitary value, will also dry out your skin.
Most soaps, and laundry detergents, that contain perfumes can also dry out your skin. Mechanical tools, like harsh sponges, sandpaper, Lou Fahs all will damage the skin and strip the oils and dry it out. Sandblasting your skin only temporarily removes the symptoms (the skin flakes), but doesn't treat the underlying problem. In fact, it makes it worse.
Don't moisturize your skin when it's dry. It's, uhm, a little late at that point. Despite what the people who make moisturizer will tell you in order to get you to buy their moisturizer, a moisturizer simply replaces the lost oils and will trap moisture into the skin. The time to apply moisturizer is when your skin is moist and damp, but not wet, like after you've towel dried after a shower. The moisturizer should be thick, very thick. A dollop in the palm of the hand should not run or drip when the palm is turned over. For dry skin, thicker is better. Just don't apply it thick. Apply a thin, even layer, then pat away the excess with a towel.
If your skin is otherwise relatively healthy, but only your butt cheeks have the problem, I'd take a close, long hard look at your butt cheeks and, oh, uhm, sorry, lost my train of thought there for a second. I'd try and figure out what your butt cheeks are having to deal with, that the rest of your skin doesn't have to deal with. Namely, the biker-boy panties.
As in, what are they made of, and what are you washing them in? Might be the fabric, the laundry detergent, or the combination of both. If the panties are the kind that are designed to let your skin breathe, to let air in and let moisture out, there ya go. The incoming air is drying your butt cheeks out, and the high tech bloomers are letting the moisture escape, resulting in a little more dust added to the planet every time you drop yer drawers.
Also, take a look at the driver's seat cushion, or lack thereof. If there's a cushion there, wash it or get a new one, and if there isn't one, get one.
Butt, you have to be honest with yourself. Do you really and truly want to get rid of the dandruff? For if you do, you can kiss that baby oil enema thang goodbye. Whew-weee, thaaat's a tough call.
Slow and steady, even in expediting, wins the race - Aesop
Prolonged showers, particularly with very hot water, and harsh soaps, will strip the oils in your skin, and will dry it out. If you get out of the shower and your skin feels all clean and tight, it's dried out. Antimicrobial soaps, all of which have no proven medical or sanitary value, will also dry out your skin.
Most soaps, and laundry detergents, that contain perfumes can also dry out your skin. Mechanical tools, like harsh sponges, sandpaper, Lou Fahs all will damage the skin and strip the oils and dry it out. Sandblasting your skin only temporarily removes the symptoms (the skin flakes), but doesn't treat the underlying problem. In fact, it makes it worse.
Don't moisturize your skin when it's dry. It's, uhm, a little late at that point. Despite what the people who make moisturizer will tell you in order to get you to buy their moisturizer, a moisturizer simply replaces the lost oils and will trap moisture into the skin. The time to apply moisturizer is when your skin is moist and damp, but not wet, like after you've towel dried after a shower. The moisturizer should be thick, very thick. A dollop in the palm of the hand should not run or drip when the palm is turned over. For dry skin, thicker is better. Just don't apply it thick. Apply a thin, even layer, then pat away the excess with a towel.
If your skin is otherwise relatively healthy, but only your butt cheeks have the problem, I'd take a close, long hard look at your butt cheeks and, oh, uhm, sorry, lost my train of thought there for a second. I'd try and figure out what your butt cheeks are having to deal with, that the rest of your skin doesn't have to deal with. Namely, the biker-boy panties.
As in, what are they made of, and what are you washing them in? Might be the fabric, the laundry detergent, or the combination of both. If the panties are the kind that are designed to let your skin breathe, to let air in and let moisture out, there ya go. The incoming air is drying your butt cheeks out, and the high tech bloomers are letting the moisture escape, resulting in a little more dust added to the planet every time you drop yer drawers.
Also, take a look at the driver's seat cushion, or lack thereof. If there's a cushion there, wash it or get a new one, and if there isn't one, get one.
Butt, you have to be honest with yourself. Do you really and truly want to get rid of the dandruff? For if you do, you can kiss that baby oil enema thang goodbye. Whew-weee, thaaat's a tough call.
Slow and steady, even in expediting, wins the race - Aesop
silverdollar
Expert Expediter
Don`t use the WD-40, it will spread over every thing, and if you are not careful you could ruin your purse.;-)
mrgoodtude
Not a Member
SD no purse i have a fanny pack.
Turtle as usual you have risen to the occasion (appreciate ya)
Thanks everyone for the laugh..
Mike
Turtle as usual you have risen to the occasion (appreciate ya)
Thanks everyone for the laugh..
Mike
mrgoodtude
Not a Member
Funny
I thought I would get 2 chuckles but results reveal that I am not the only one with this problem...
That is what I love about this forum.. Of the people for the people and because I put myself out there someones azz will benefit.
Lets move on:+
I thought I would get 2 chuckles but results reveal that I am not the only one with this problem...
That is what I love about this forum.. Of the people for the people and because I put myself out there someones azz will benefit.
Lets move on:+
mrgoodtude
Not a Member
>I have come to the conclusion that everyone on here is
>nuts!!(I don't mean that in a bad way either) Thanks for
>the laugh, it has made my day!!:+ :+ (Sorry Mike, don't mean
>to laugh at your butt problem)
Its Ok Arlene we are all in good company and the best part is there will be 20+ male expediters today checking for azz dandruff....
Me Win
Mike
>nuts!!(I don't mean that in a bad way either) Thanks for
>the laugh, it has made my day!!:+ :+ (Sorry Mike, don't mean
>to laugh at your butt problem)
Its Ok Arlene we are all in good company and the best part is there will be 20+ male expediters today checking for azz dandruff....
Me Win
Mike
arkjarhead
Veteran Expediter
I've never had a problem with dry skin. I don't know if it's because it's so humib here or what. But even when I was in the desert I had no problem. I have oily skin to. My parents told me since I have so many Indian ancestors that could be it. Evidently they have oily skin who nows?
hondaking38
Veteran Expediter
glad i dont have it...just a odor after a couple days and no shower..or so my wife says when i get home
nightcreacher
Veteran Expediter
you sure its not shingles
davebeckym
Expert Expediter
Reminds me of George Brett. Remember when he had a hemroid during the World Series? He was the butt of all the sports writer's jokes. So you're in good company, Mr Tude!
I have had problems with itching and dry skin. These problems started when I started driving in Y2K. Every year about October/November I'd start to itch. It was worse on my lower legs, crotch, and arms, in that order.
What was I doing different? Well, I stared using the heater that time of year, and my lower legs took biggest hit.
I was driving long distances which cuts off circulation, especially in the crotch, butt area. Remember what Turtle said about the biker shorts? Well, both kinds of bikers have circulation problems in the same areas. Bike riders who race, wear the biker shorts to cut down on wind resistance. Bikers shorts make the circulation problems worse. And of course Harley Bikers make the problem worse by wearing leather pants.
So what did I do? Well, I switched to boxer shorts, Cin will think you look sexy in those too, Mr Tude, so not to worry. Give those old ones to the Salvation army or the Rescue Mission. Homeless men need to be sexy too.
For the shower I use Dove or Ivory unscented soap. The baby shampoo sounds good too. I've tried all the aforementioned lotions plus udder cream, which worked well on my man boobs! What worked best for me is to put cortisone cream on any red rashy areas. These are easy too see right after a shower. Then I put warm baby lotion all over my body. I fill the sink up with hot water and put the bottle in there just before I shower. It feels good and goes on thin so you don't have to towel any of it off. And because it's warm, it doesn't come out of the bottle like Heinz ketchup, the ketchup that lost!
Cin will like you smelling like a baby, which is a lot cheaper than her "wanting a baby".
I have had problems with itching and dry skin. These problems started when I started driving in Y2K. Every year about October/November I'd start to itch. It was worse on my lower legs, crotch, and arms, in that order.
What was I doing different? Well, I stared using the heater that time of year, and my lower legs took biggest hit.
I was driving long distances which cuts off circulation, especially in the crotch, butt area. Remember what Turtle said about the biker shorts? Well, both kinds of bikers have circulation problems in the same areas. Bike riders who race, wear the biker shorts to cut down on wind resistance. Bikers shorts make the circulation problems worse. And of course Harley Bikers make the problem worse by wearing leather pants.
So what did I do? Well, I switched to boxer shorts, Cin will think you look sexy in those too, Mr Tude, so not to worry. Give those old ones to the Salvation army or the Rescue Mission. Homeless men need to be sexy too.
For the shower I use Dove or Ivory unscented soap. The baby shampoo sounds good too. I've tried all the aforementioned lotions plus udder cream, which worked well on my man boobs! What worked best for me is to put cortisone cream on any red rashy areas. These are easy too see right after a shower. Then I put warm baby lotion all over my body. I fill the sink up with hot water and put the bottle in there just before I shower. It feels good and goes on thin so you don't have to towel any of it off. And because it's warm, it doesn't come out of the bottle like Heinz ketchup, the ketchup that lost!
Cin will like you smelling like a baby, which is a lot cheaper than her "wanting a baby".
mrgoodtude
Not a Member
Classic!
Thanks Dave for being man enough to put yourself out there...
Going boxer shopping at KOHLS in the morning...
You guys rock
Thanks Dave for being man enough to put yourself out there...
Going boxer shopping at KOHLS in the morning...
You guys rock