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A bloke walks into a Glasgow library and says to the prim librarian, 'Excuse me Miss, dey ye hiv ony books on suicide?' To which she stops doing her tasks, looks at him over the top of her glasses and says, 'Boog off, ye'll no bring it back!'

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This guy is funny. A natural comedian. iIt's about 12 minutes but worth it.. Yeoman Warden At Tower Of London, Part II Of Four - YouTube

How's all that change and audacity working out for you bunky? Dyslexics have more nuf.

1. I would not tell them. Maybe they like pork, and are not that strict, so "no harm, no foul". 2. The tickets belong to the guys who got them. They took the initiative, thought of it first, and went for it. The co workers who did the favor of covering for them, were just doing a common...

LAUS DEO,Do you know what it means? One detail that is never mentioned is that in Washington , D.C. There can never be a building of greater height than the Washington Monument. With all the uproar about removing the ten commandments, etc., this is worth a moment or two of your time. I was not...

Another example of why we are where we are. Coins Costing Taxpayers? | Video - ABC News

Wounded Warriors & President Bush (July 4th, 2011) - YouTube

TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US!!!! An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: 'They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the...

The English language has some wonderfully anthropomorphic collective nouns for the various groups of animals. We are all familiar with a Herd of cows, a Flock of chickens, a School of fish and a Gaggle of geese. However, less widely known is a Pride of lions, a Murder of crows...

Miss Beatrice, The church organist, Was in her eighties And had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared...

There is an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year's term was: "Political Correctness." The winner wrote: "Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly...

Cat and owl playing. [VIDEO]

A cop stops a biker for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. He asks the biker his name. 'Fred,' he replies. 'Fred what?' the officer asks. 'Just Fred,' the man responds. The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the biker a break and write him out a...

This is the nightly routine of closing the border between India and Pakistan. Takes posturing more than a notch up. How the border between India and Pakistan is closed, every day. [VIDEO]

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, 'Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.' - Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter) <><> I had a rose named after me and I was very...

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1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you. 2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name. 3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor. 4. A dog's parents never visit. 5. Dogs agree that you have to raise...

This is for me. I wonder if this tells you that it fits well. The Future of Shopping

Knowing full well mistakes are made by people in every profession, I think cops take it on the chin way to often. I get tired of seeing movies where cops are crashing into each other like a bunch of bumbling morons, and doing the one wheel car into the air over a parked car the way Hollywood...