A fellow received a mouse for his birthday and he loved it so much that he never parted with it. He took this mouse everywhere, to work, to parties, to the opera... One day, a good friend of his died and so he went to pay his respects. Naturally, he took the mouse, which was perched on his shoulder.
On his way home, he suddenly realized that the mouse was gone! He retraced all his moves for the day and realized that the last place he had seen the mouse was at the funeral. He had closed the mouse in the funeral car, so as not to frighten the other people attending the service. He raced back across town, but it was too late. He spoke to the funeral directors, but they couldn't find it: it had completely vanished.
The man was filled with grief as he remembered an old adage his mother had told him time and time again as a kid:
Never lock a gift mouse in the hearse.
It's Harvest Sunday at a small village church in rural England, and the vicar is organizing his annual harvest service, where people bring their home-grown plants and vegetables to the service.
But this year is different. The local village cricket team has just won their league, and the village is in a celebratory mood, so the vicar decides to do something special - he will combine the normal harvest service with a cricket theme.
The day of the service arrives, and the church is filled with flowers. People are bringing in their offerings of vegetables, and in the middle of the display is a cricket wicket; a strip of turf with a set of wooden stumps at each end, and people are laying their offerings on the wicket.
Everything is going fine, until one lady comes up to the front of the church, and places a bag of frozen peas among the other vegetables, but she is stopped by the vicar, so she returns to her seat, still clutching her peas.
"What happened?" asked the lady she's sitting next to.
She shrugs her shoulders, and says:
"There's no peas for the wicket."
On his way home, he suddenly realized that the mouse was gone! He retraced all his moves for the day and realized that the last place he had seen the mouse was at the funeral. He had closed the mouse in the funeral car, so as not to frighten the other people attending the service. He raced back across town, but it was too late. He spoke to the funeral directors, but they couldn't find it: it had completely vanished.
The man was filled with grief as he remembered an old adage his mother had told him time and time again as a kid:
Never lock a gift mouse in the hearse.
It's Harvest Sunday at a small village church in rural England, and the vicar is organizing his annual harvest service, where people bring their home-grown plants and vegetables to the service.
But this year is different. The local village cricket team has just won their league, and the village is in a celebratory mood, so the vicar decides to do something special - he will combine the normal harvest service with a cricket theme.
The day of the service arrives, and the church is filled with flowers. People are bringing in their offerings of vegetables, and in the middle of the display is a cricket wicket; a strip of turf with a set of wooden stumps at each end, and people are laying their offerings on the wicket.
Everything is going fine, until one lady comes up to the front of the church, and places a bag of frozen peas among the other vegetables, but she is stopped by the vicar, so she returns to her seat, still clutching her peas.
"What happened?" asked the lady she's sitting next to.
She shrugs her shoulders, and says:
"There's no peas for the wicket."