If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious
diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with
walking twenty-five miles to school every morning ... uphill BOTH ways.
yadda, yadda, yadda
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in
in the world I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I
had it and how easy they've got it!
But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but
look around and notice the youth of today.
You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a dang
Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got
it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know
something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves, in the
card catalog!!
There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter with a pen!
Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox
and it would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to
hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself!
Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd
usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and
somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you
had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your
bookie, the local hoods, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You
had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like
'Space Invaders' and 'asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You
actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or
screens, it was just one screen
forever!
And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and
faster and faster until you died!
Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there was no such thing as stadium seating!
All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a
hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15
channels and there was no on screen menu and no remote control! You had to
use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were
screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your butt and
walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network
either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what
I'm saying!?!
We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little ratfinks!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to
use the stove or go build a frigging fire. Imagine that! If we wanted
popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the
stove forever like an idiot.
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 70`s and 80`s!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious
diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with
walking twenty-five miles to school every morning ... uphill BOTH ways.
yadda, yadda, yadda
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in
in the world I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I
had it and how easy they've got it!
But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but
look around and notice the youth of today.
You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a dang
Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got
it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know
something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves, in the
card catalog!!
There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter with a pen!
Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox
and it would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to
hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself!
Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd
usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and
somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you
had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your
bookie, the local hoods, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You
had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like
'Space Invaders' and 'asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You
actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or
screens, it was just one screen
forever!
And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and
faster and faster until you died!
Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there was no such thing as stadium seating!
All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a
hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15
channels and there was no on screen menu and no remote control! You had to
use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were
screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your butt and
walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network
either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what
I'm saying!?!
We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little ratfinks!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to
use the stove or go build a frigging fire. Imagine that! If we wanted
popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the
stove forever like an idiot.
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 70`s and 80`s!
