Joe's operation

louixo

Veteran Expediter
Charter Member
Joe goes to the doctor for his terrible headaches. The doctor said, 'Joe, the good news is I can cure your severe headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates your terrible constant headaches.
The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.' Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.
He saw a men's clothing store and thought, `That's what I need, a new suit.'
He entered the shop and told the salesman, `I'd like a new suit.'
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, 'Let's see, size 44 long.'
Joe laughed, `That's right, how did you know?'
`Been in the business 60 years!' the tailor said.
Joe tried on the suit; it fit perfectly.
As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, 'How about a new shirt?'
Joe thought for a moment and then said, `Sure.'
The salesman eyed Joe and said, `Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck.'
Joe was surprised, `That's right, how did you know?'
`Been in the business 60 years.'
Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly.
Joe walked comfortably around the shop, and the salesman asked, `How about some new underwear?'
Joe thought for a moment and said, `Sure.'
The salesman said, `Let's see … size 36.'
Joe laughed, `Ah ha! I got you, I've worn a size 34 brief since I was 18 years old.'
The salesman shook his head, 'You can't wear a size 34.
A size 34 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache'
New suit - $400
New shirt - $36
New underwear - $6
Second opinion - PRICELESS
 

AMonger

Veteran Expediter
Related: A guy goes to a doctor and asks to be castrated. The doctor is aghast.

"Castrate you? Are you serious?"

The man assured him he was. The doctor tried to talk him out of it, telling him what a drastic action it was. He tried for quite some time and eventually sent the man home to think it over.

The man came back a week later, saying that he had thought it over and was sure that he wanted the procedure. Again, the doctor tried to talk him out of it, but to no avail. Finally, the patient said that if he wouldn't do it, he'd just go to another doctor who would, and he would cash his check.

Well, money talks, so the doctor scheduled the operation.

After the operation, the doctor came by the patient's room to check on him. He said, "You know, this is the first castration I've done. When a patient like you comes to me about a procedure, it's usually circumcison."

The patient slapped his forehead: "THAT was the word--circumcision!"
 
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