Headlines for the year 2029

louixo

Veteran Expediter
Charter Member
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia , formerly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq , Afghanistan , Syria and Lebanon ).


Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 100 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica .

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed , they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals, violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
 

RichM

Veteran Expediter
Charter Member
More Headlines for 2029:

Ohio State loses to East Montana State in the Big Sky Bowl

President Cheslea Clinton abolishes Congress and declare that the USA will seek to become part of Mexacalfornia.

General Motors cuts down to one shift on it's last remaining US Plant.

The Euro is now accepted at all 7/11's

The last running FL70 is donated to the Smithsonian Insitute where it is enshrined with the likes of the DC3 and a Union Pacific 4-8-4 Steam Engine.
 
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terryandrene

Veteran Expediter
Safety & Compliance
US Coast Guard
EO forum members complain about FSC not keeping up with the $12.00 a gallon fuel.

Ontimemedia launches second satellite in it's quest to improve it's standing as the expedited freight information center.

Louixo posts his 10,000 humerous thread

PantherV increases van rates to 78 cents per mile, all other carriers follow suit.
 

copdsux

Veteran Expediter
Charter Member
Please give attribution when quoting someone else's material.
This list is attributed to David Collyer, 03/01/05, on a forum called "lace-chat".
 

RichM

Veteran Expediter
Charter Member
One important headline that I forgot to add is:

UPS plans to enter the expediting services industry.
 
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