Christian Zingers

louixo

Veteran Expediter
Charter Member
Christian One Liners

Don't let your worries get the best of you; Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

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Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited

Until you try to sit in their pews.

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Many folks want to serve God,

But only as advisers.

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It is easier to preach ten sermons

Than it is to live one.

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The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose,

But mosquitoes come close.

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When you get to your wit's end,

You'll find God lives there.

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People are funny; they want the front of the bus,

Middle of the road,

And back of the church.

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Opportunity may knock once,

But temptation bangs on the front door forever.

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Quit griping about your church;

If it was perfect, you couldn't belong.

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If a church wants a better pastor,

It only needs to pray for the one it has.

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We're called to be witnesses, not lawyers or Judges.

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God Himself doesn't propose to judge a man until

he is dead. So why should you?

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Some minds are like concrete

Thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

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Peace starts with a smile.

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I don't know why some people change churches;

What difference does it make which one you stay home from?

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Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.

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Stop, Drop, and Roll won't work in Hell.

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Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

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Don't put a question mark where God put a period.

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Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.

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Forbidden fruits create many jams.

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God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

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God grades on the cross, not the curve.

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God loves everyone,

But probably prefers 'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts!'

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God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

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He who angers you, controls you!

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If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!

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Prayer:

Don't give God instructions, just report for duty!

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The task ahead of us is never as

great as the Power behind us.

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The Will of God never takes you to where the

Grace of God will not protect you.

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We don't change the message,

The message changes us.

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You can tell how big a person is

By what it takes to discourage him/her.

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The best mathematical equation I have ever seen:

1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

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