10 ways to get revenge on a telemarketer

[louixo]

10. When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them! "I'm so glad you asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..."

9. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name.
Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located.
Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as
long as necessary.

8. Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy,
how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends ... would
you be my friend?"

6. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

5. Tell the telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips

4. After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

3. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their HOME number, you say "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!" Say good by - and Hang up.

2. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on
Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your mom?"

And first and foremost:

1. Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD down.

 

[unorthodoxneon]

Why you gotta mess with people trying to make a buck. Imagine if the shippers or cons played jokes on us. Geeze


Anywho, i really like listening to Jim Florentine when he messes with them. I dont mind telemarketers as much but when they dont get no after the first 50 times i get mad. Usually when they call i'll just say, oh they moved, or i just got this number a few days ago ect.

 

[theoldprof]

When the telemarketers call they usually say "Hello, Mr. theoldprof, how are you?" Since nobody cares how I am except telemarketers, that is a dead giveaway. I usually say as politely as I can that I am not interested, goodbye and hang up. A couple years ago, before I got on the No Call List, the phone rang, I picked it up, "How are you, etc. etc. I'm not interested, etc. hang up. About a minute later the phone rang again, "Hello, Mr theoldprof, then very quickly the voice said "This is St Bubba's Hospital reminding you of your appointment for your gizzard test tomorrow". I heard about that one from my wife for a long time.
:+ :+

 

[Critter Truckin]

I like to tell them I'm on welfare and then ask if they take layaway.

 

[cheri1122]

I used to keep a stuffed clown near the phone, for just those calls - when it's tummy was poked, it laughed the most wicked, evil, SCARY laugh imagineable. I kind of hated doing it to innocent people, who were just trying to make a living, but I didn't call them, after all, they called me.